The Meaning of Meaning
How important is a definition?
"So difficult it is to show the various meanings and imperfections of words when we have nothing else but words to do it with.”
~ John Locke
We as humans are limited beings. There are certain things we can do that separate us from all other living organisms, abilities that have helped us develop and evolve. These include our thinking capabilities, empathy and theory of mind and ethics, self-reflection and metacognition, advanced tool usage and creativity, cultural and artistic expression, and so on. Similarly, there are certain things we cannot do. We cannot fly for instance, or breathe underwater without support. Amongst the things we cannot do, is the fact that we’re not psychic. We cannot read each other’s minds and control other people directly. Because of this, we’ve created complex language and communication mediums for us to engage with one another.
Language can be seen as nothing less than a marvel. The crafting of sounds and shapes to form alphabets and words that derive meaning serves as the cornerstone of our society. This intricate system of language allows us to convey abstract ideas, share our experiences, and build a shared understanding of the world. Through language, we can communicate not only what is happening in the present but also delve into the past and speculate about the future.
The words we use and their respective definitions help us establish a common ground with those we are communicating with, ensuring that our interactions are meaningful and effective. When definitions become fluid or are altered to fit personal narratives, it can lead to confusion and miscommunication. While it's natural for language to evolve, maintaining a shared understanding of key terms is essential for maintaining coherent and productive discourse.
We take language for granted, but this can change. When it does, so will everything else.
What is meaning?
At its core, meaning refers to the significance or purpose that something holds, whether it’s a word, concept, action, or experience. Typically, there are three types of meaning:
Linguistic meaning: In language, meaning is about how words and phrases convey information or ideas. It's often divided into semantics (the study of meaning in language) and pragmatics (the study of how context influences interpretation). For eg. the word bank can mean either a financial institution or the side of a river. Its meaning depends on the context.
Philosophical meaning: When someone asks, "What is the meaning of life?" they are grappling with philosophical meaning. Different individuals and cultures might have varied answers—some may find meaning in religious beliefs, others in relationships, achievements, or simply the act of living itself. I’ve shared my views on this in my article - why there is no ‘higher purpose’ in life.
Psychological meaning: This relates to how individuals make sense of their experiences and life events, contributing to their sense of identity and purpose. For eg. an individual goes through a traumatic event and derives some form of perceived meaning from it.
This article will focus primarily on linguistic meaning, i.e. the implications of words, definitions, and context in language.
Definitions here, definitions there
A definition is an explanation of the meaning of a word, term, or concept. It helps clarify what a word refers to and the boundaries of its usage. Like meaning, there are three types of definitions:
Intensional definition: Specifies the essential qualities or characteristics that a thing must have to fall under a certain term. It focuses on the internal attributes that define the concept. For eg. “A ‘triangle’ is a three-sided polygon.” This definition gives the necessary characteristics for something to be considered a triangle.
Extensional definition: Defines a term by listing all the specific examples or instances that fall under it. It focuses on external examples that embody the concept. For eg. An extensional definition of ‘fruit’ might include examples like apples, bananas, and oranges. Instead of describing the qualities of fruit, it points to actual examples of the category.
Ostensive definition: Not too different from extensional definitions, this includes pointing to an example or demonstrating what the term refers to, often used when explaining concepts to children or in practical situations. For eg. If you're teaching someone the meaning of ‘table,’ you might point to an actual table and say, "This is a table."
Definitions are important. As mentioned above, they help clarify what our words refer to and outline the boundaries of their usage. This is crucial because, without this, words lose their inherent meaning. Every word we use has meaning that we associate with it, and that is why we use it in the respective context. This ties in with grammar, vocabulary, and syntax. Knowing the meaning of words and how they flow together is an essential part of our communication that we take for granted. Here’s an eg.
"Banana you to alpaca this purple sense glue does?”
Or better yet:
"Any you to sentence sense this make does?”
Both of the above sentences don’t make sense. The original sentence with the right words and syntax is:
“Does this sentence make any sense to you?”
By replacing words or shuffling the order, we remove any associated meaning in the sentence by ignoring grammar rules. This is why definitions and language laws are important….but to what extent?
Changing the narrative
How often do we find ourselves in positions where we change certain meanings or definitions to suit our desired narratives? Lying is the best example of this. What constitutes ‘the truth’ and ‘a lie’? We as humans don’t like being lied to, and yet many of us lie every single day. White lies, small talk lies, all sorts of lies. Here are some examples of cases where we change our ideas of meaning to suit our narratives:
Freedom - typically includes the ability to act, speak, or think without undue restraint.
People may redefine ‘freedom’ to justify actions that infringe on others' rights, equating personal liberty with the absence of any rules or responsibilities.
Patriotism - Includes love for and dedication to one's country.
When taken to the extreme, the idea of ‘patriotism’ to justify exclusionary or aggressive policies, conflating it with nationalism or superiority, rather than love for shared values and diversity. This form of jingoism can blind people and sway them away from the harsh truths that may be plaguing their country.
Toxic - Originally meaning poisonous or harmful.
With social media, the word ‘toxic’ has been stretched to label a wide range of behaviours, sometimes used loosely to describe any uncomfortable or disagreeable actions in relationships or situations, diluting its original severity. Someone might be suffering inside and therefore display unconventional behaviour. Rather than helping the individual, people assume they’re toxic.
Bigotry- Intolerance toward those who hold different opinions, beliefs, or identities.
Some people may redefine or stretch the term bigotry to label any disagreement or criticism as bigotry, especially when their views or beliefs are challenged. This can dilute the term, making distinguishing between genuine bigotry (prejudice and intolerance) and healthy debate or differing opinions harder. Disagree with someone on anything related to gender, LGBTQIA+, racism, or culture and you risk being labelled a bigot.
Granted, language is not static. As we change, so does our choice of words. It’s also true that some words don’t have set-in-stone definitions. Words like love, friendship, passion, and honesty, can be considered malleable wherein the meaning differs from person to person.
However, for all other instances, there are a few reasons why we often fall into this trap of redefining terms and meaning to suit our narratives. How many of these can you relate to?
Cognitive dissonance - This is when a person's behaviour and beliefs do not complement each other or when they hold two contradictory beliefs. When people encounter ideas or facts that conflict with their beliefs, they experience cognitive dissonance in the form of discomfort. To reduce this discomfort, they may alter the meaning of terms or concepts to align with their pre-existing worldview.
For eg. Someone who believes they are a good partner might redefine ‘neglect’ as ‘giving space’ when they don’t spend time with their partner, to avoid feeling guilty.
Power and control - Language shapes how we understand the world. By changing the definition of a word or concept, people can control how others perceive an issue. It’s a way of exerting influence over the narrative.
For eg. A friend might redefine ‘helping’ as ‘just offering advice’ to control the dynamic, even when their friend needs actual support or action, not just words.
Justifications - People often shift definitions to justify behaviours or beliefs that might otherwise be viewed negatively. By adjusting the meaning of words, they can make their actions appear more acceptable or righteous.
For eg. A person might redefine ‘being honest’ as ‘it is what it is’ to justify rude behaviour or hurtful comments, making it seem like they’re just being truthful.
Social validation - In today’s world, language can strengthen group identity. By shifting definitions, people align themselves with a particular social group or ideology, gaining validation and a sense of belonging.
For eg. A person might redefine ‘compromise’ as ‘sacrificing their happiness’ to validate their sense of loyalty, even if the relationship is unhealthy.
The list goes on.
What can be done?
The moment we give in to the idea that everyone is entitled to their definitions, we create an invisible obstacle in front of us that hinders our ability to have a proper conversation. Consider the following example:
Imagine a debate between an atheist and a Christian about the existence of God. The atheist firmly argues that God doesn’t exist, citing a lack of empirical evidence for an omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient being who controls the universe.
The Christian, however, responds by redefining the concept of God, saying, “Well, when I say ‘God,’ I don’t mean some divine, supernatural being watching over us. I mean the force that connects all living things—love, energy, and the natural laws of the universe itself. God is simply the interconnectedness of life and the universe.”
The atheist, caught off guard by this redefinition, pauses for a moment and replies, “Well, if that’s what you mean by God—a metaphor for the laws of nature and the energy that binds us all—then yes, I guess you could say that God exists in that sense.”
In this scenario, the Christian shifts the definition of God from a traditional, supernatural entity to something abstract and universal. This redefinition aligns more with what the atheist might already believe in—science, energy, and interconnectedness—leading to an unexpected agreement, though they’re no longer talking about the same concept of God that most people understand and are told to believe in from religious scriptures.
This form of redefinition brings with it a loss of clarity. Words are our tools for communication, and when they lose their clear, shared meaning, it becomes difficult to have meaningful discussions. It’s akin to playing a game and as you’re winning, your opponent conveniently shifts the goalposts. When done in relationships, this often comes in the form of manipulation or gaslighting.
In the example above, both the atheist and the Christian might walk away thinking they’ve reached common ground, but in reality, they’re talking about two very different concepts. For people with strong religious or philosophical beliefs, redefining a term like God can dilute its original significance.
While it's true that everyone has the freedom to express themselves in the way they choose, the issue arises when we lose our common language. Words carry weight in society, and if we start freely changing definitions to suit our narratives, it diminishes the effectiveness of communication. ‘Letting people do what they want’ in terms of redefining words can result in a world where meaningful conversations break down because people are no longer speaking the same language, figuratively speaking.
A solution to the issue of changing definitions to suit personal narratives lies in fostering open, honest communication. In relationships and thoughtful discussions, clarifying terms is essential. Asking questions like "What do you mean by that?" encourages both people to align on definitions, reducing misunderstandings. Active listening helps uncover underlying reasons for shifts in meaning while creating a safe space for vulnerability and encourages people to express their thoughts without the need to distort language.
When definitions are being stretched, using analogies or examples helps bring abstract concepts into simple terms, promoting shared understanding. Ultimately, recognising emotional triggers that lead to shifting definitions can open up space for more genuine conversations, where openness and understanding take priority over self-justification.
In my experience, knowing the difference between what’s a matter of opinion and what’s not has helped me structure my thoughts and framework of the world. Granted, sometimes a good conversation is one where we must see things through the other person’s eyes. It’s difficult but can be fruitful if our goal is to foster healthy, positive relationships without compromising on our values and beliefs. What better way to do that than by talking it out?
We humans have created all sorts of tools to help us thrive in the world. Conversation is our main tool to engage with others, so it only makes sense for us to sharpen this tool and in doing so, strengthen the way we communicate with those around us.